"The Scottish Constable"
Newton Stewart, Scotland
August 10, 1983
Dear Folks,
Scotland rose from the eastern horizon of the North Atlantic to enchant me for the first time several evenings ago. Low, softly-wrinkled, and shrouded in the red mist of a melting sun, its gold-tinted humps had lolled on the waves in such a playful manner as to make me think of whales.
With the white plume of a lighthouse spouting from its most forward ridge, one particularly lonely peninsula captured my attention for the longest time. I was fascinated by how the chilly sea breezes swept across its unpopulated hills and dells with total freedom. In
the simple unbroken void resting upon its grasses, I sensed a pocket of time and space where the past still weighs very heavily on the second hand of the present; Where, instead of being disrespectfully
trampled under, history is simply allowed to crumble away at its own pace, like the Celtic crosses on the emerald Ireland I had sailed away from earlier that day.
As during my first view of this old country, my passage overland on foot these past several days has been steeped in quiet contemplation. Life here in the farmlands of south Scotland strikes me as being so uneventful that even the devil of the Irish--if he will pardon me for saying so--would be hard-pressed to cause much of a commotion among these people on any given day.
Now, lest you think that I am about to let my Irish heritage show through by making jest of the conservatism and the sobriety the Scots are universally labeled with, let me clearly state that such is not to be the case here. You see, there is someone I met three days ago whose experiences with the Scottish mentality will do well enough in illustrating how staid life is in these parts. He is someone of unquestionable integrity and is vastly studious of his fellow Scots' moral character, as well as a champion in the garnering of respect. He is, as a matter of fact, a chief constable.
Mister Murray and I met in the village of Glenluce, where for over two decades he has been the only policeman of that quaint highway town's seven hundred or so residents. I had gone to his station, in his home, to request an "official signature" from the town for entry into my logbook--my excuse being that I'd like to get credit for this rather lengthy walk I've ventured on. Whereupon, he being duly impressed and all, instructed his matronly wife to boil us a pot of tea, while he took the opportunity to learn more about his uniformed peers on my side of "the waters."
"Is it really like on the American coop showz I watch on me telly, what where the police goo rooshin' oofter t'roobers wi' flashin' stroobs ayn lewd sarnz?" he mumbled with traditional aplomb.
I contemplated for a few very interesting seconds what "flashin' stroobs" and "lewd sarnz" might be, decided with a bit of disappointment he was talking about flashing strobes and loud sirens, and finally settled for nodding with my nose buried in my tea cup.
"But t' roobers connear it, ayn git 'way!" he said.
This time I was more polite and nodded with a sugar wafer poking from between my lips. He rubbed his balding head and inquired with still more disbelief in his voice: "You mean to tell me the policemoon really use all them big goonz, too?"
Again I had to confirm what he had seen on the television dramas.
He shook his head in amazement, saying that he had always thought the policemen in those American shows were too much like something from another universe to be believable. What a frightening place to live--or even visit!--he said, as much to his wife as to me. Pointing to a shiny black truncheon the length of a tall man's forearm, he assured me that the club was the only weapon he'd ever had in his twenty-six years of keeping the law in Glenluce.
"Ayn not woonce 'ave I 'ad to pool it froom me belt," he boasted with pride, adding with a laugh, "Ayn I 'ope I nev'r doo! Cuz I'll a toon a paperwork to fill out explainin' why I pooled it on soomeone."
I had to laugh, too. Back in the hills of the Ohio Valley where I was from, the thought of a policeman lasting twenty-six years with only a billy club for protection would have seemed absolutely preposterous. A policeman without his pistol, his big car, his shotgun, his club, and, yes, all those big flashing "stroobs" would be...well, he wouldn't be a real cop in the eyes of most.
By the third cup of tea, I got around to asking the good constable what the most serious crime was he'd ever had to face in Glenluce. Surely like any veteran policeman in the States he'd seen his share of violence. And, from the way his eyes lit up after a brief spell of pondering, I just knew he had come up with a real thriller, one that would prove the Glenlucians were as normal as the rest of us.
The worst thing that had ever happened took place just a few weeks before, he said gravely. The prepetrators had been a handful of the local lads who were having a wake at one of the area's pubs for a buddy killed in an auto accient down in England's way. Came the 10 o'clock closing time of all pubs in the British Isles, and the lads seemed a bit reluctant to start for home. So in strode the large form of Constable Murray, to kindly refresh their sense of law and order. At which time a few of the more high-spirited "snook" out a side door, ran around to the street, and carefully lifted--by themselves--the constable's tiny car off the asphalt, only to set in back down a minute later in the same spot--on its roof!
Since those still in the pub were more than willing to "right matters," so to speak, with Constable Murray, all was forgiven within short time. True, an actual crime of a shameless nature had besmirched the streets of Glenluce, but there were more important things to be worrying about--like sleep--than to bother with all that "paperwook."
Steven
Comments
Sounds as peaceful as the country in West Virginia...just joking of course.
If I ever make it to Scotland, I'll be sure to take a nice walk here and meet some of the locals. This sounds like a great place to visit.
Posted by: John Smithson | December 13, 2005 10:27 PM
What a lovely place in which to live. Ohio is great but couldn't begin to hold up to Constable Murray's peaceful little corner of the world.
Have you ever heard from him since your walk? My small rural NW Ohio home is almost that peaceful. Tonight is a lovely full moon g;listening the snow that surrounds my home. God is indeed good, all the time!!!
Dave-Sycamore, Ohio, bank dinner, 2005
Posted by: Dave Fadley | December 13, 2005 10:40 PM
Merry Christmas, Steve and Darci (and Gabe)!
The new job is wonderful and word has it Santa will be visiting us soon.
As you can imagine, Adrian is quite excited about the prospect.
Here's a white Christmas on Worldwalk Hill!
TJB
Posted by: Terry | December 20, 2005 3:08 PM
Hello Mr. Newman,
I reside in Batavia, Ohio and live on St. Rt. 222 near Slade Rd. and East Fork / Harsha Lake. I have backpacked the perimeter trail (named after you) twice, and spend, what seems to most, a superfluous amount of time in the forests of this area (you must know them and love them as I do). I have noticed through the years that the State Park Service, coupled with the Army Corp of Engineers, have let this beautiful and diverse area become polluted, over-recreationalized (constant boating, jet skiing, etc.), and littered to the point of "proactive neglect" (<-----oxymoron) $$$$$$$$$!. Shorelines are littered with any and every modern recreational contrivance imaginable. Even most of the litter has litter on it. I have done my best during the winter months to keep most trails and to a lesser extent shorelines litter free, but find it impossible to keep up with the yearly onslaught of the ecologically mindless "tourists." Please respond if there is any way you can help put an end to this wanton destruction and finally bring the Park back to a natural equilibrium.
Thanks for your time,
Robert Newman
p.s. Are we possibly related? Do you know the Newman's from Newtown: Marsha, Rodney, Connie, Gail...? Wouldn't that be a hoot? Thanks again.
Posted by: Robert Newman | December 24, 2005 10:57 PM
John,
West Virginia is indeed a beautiful and peaceful place. I have many fond memories of whitewater rafting, bicycling, and hiking in your home state. Those of us who live near West Virginia can not help but be attracted to it. Every American should have the good fortune of experiencing West Virginia's abundant natural treasures at some point in their life.
I have visited your Kanawha Trail Club Hike Journal at journalsaol.com, and I recommend it to everyone out there who wants to read about some very fascinating walkers and hikers.
Steven
Posted by: steven newman | January 18, 2006 11:13 AM
Dave,
I agree with you that "God is indeed good, all the time!!!" Whether we live in Constable Murray's world or here in Ohio, we are all blessed to have been a part of this special force we call Life. There are so many good and beautiful things going on around us every minute, and yet so many are blind to them, because they choose to live in fear and even anger. So good to see you have such a positive character. But then, I remember when I spoke at the Sycamore Bank's annual stockholder dinner, and how absolutely nice everyone was to me. The people in your area of Ohio are wonderful examples of the hospitality and gentleness that the vast rural areas of America's Midwest are famous for. Please tell everyone I said hello, and that I haven't forgotten their smiles and good humor. You and your neighbors around Sycamore, Ohio, are the perfect audience with which to share travel stories.
Steven
Posted by: steven newman | January 18, 2006 11:27 AM
Terry,
So good to read that all is well with you and Kim and little Adrian. It's great that Santa decided to visit, but I know it couldn't have been because of you!!!
Christmas here on Worldwalker Hill wasn't all that white, but at this moment the forest outside my office window is coated in a mid-January snowfall and looks like a scene from an old-fashioned Christmas card. However, the temperature tomorrow is supposed to go back into the 60's. What a crazy winter!! Autumn reminded me of a second coming of the Great Ice Age, but as soon as the winter season started, the temperatures have been more appropriate for New Orleans. At least I haven't had to cut much firewood. And, even better, I can get in some early fishing this year!!!!!
Steven
Posted by: steven newman | January 18, 2006 11:45 AM
Robert,
I can relate to the frustration and disgust you have felt at seeing all the litter left behind by many of the visitors to East Fork State Park. Litter has always seemed so senseless and infuriating to me, too. I have never been able to understand how anyone could thoughtlessly mar the natural beauty that is throughout our nation's parks and along our roadways and hiking paths. In my mind, people who litter are lazy, selfish, and ignorant.
I am glad to read that on some of your hikes in East Fork you make an effort to pick up bits of the litter. My wife Darci and I do the same, when we take our daily walks and when we go hiking or biking. If all Americans did such, it would certainly make our nation vastly more beautiful.
I doubt that the litter found on the shores of East Fork Lake and along the Steven Newman Worldwalker Perimeter Trail can be blamed in any way on the park's staff, for they are so understaffed as it is. Alas, our state has had to make drastic cuts in the personnel at our state's parks in the past several years, due to budget cutbacks. There are just too many visitors to East Fork for the rangers to keep an eye on them all. However, I believe strongly that the state of Ohio should take the lead nationally and make littering of any kind a heavily-fined offence. There needs to be a "zero tolerance" for such activities. We all hate being fined and caught "breaking the law."
With your permission I would like to pass your comments on to the staff at East Fork State Park. I am sure they are aware of the problem, too, but still they need to be reminded that we really do need to start cutting down on the stresses being placed on the park's natural resources by our allowing continuous human activities inside it. Perhaps we should start seriously considering, for the health of the park's lands and animals, the idea of shutting the park to humans for a few weeks each winter. Yellowstone Park does such.
And as for you inquiry as to if we are related, I don't think we are. But then, I really have no idea. It is possible.
At any rate, please continue to raise your voice for the health of our state's outdoors. If enough of us do such, then the politicians have to start listening.
Steven
Posted by: steven newman | January 18, 2006 12:15 PM